I had been hoping for an exciting, random moment.
It came to me.
As my audience knows, I work in a hotel. My job is quite tedious at times and frustrating as well. Paperwork floods my office space, and clutters of clips scatter themselves accross the desk. On this particular evening, my work seemed to be getting done on time. My reports were complete, my files had been filed, and most of my phone calls had been made. I was just finishing up some paperwork when the sliding double-doors open. I hear the wheels rolling from a suitcase and I immediately know it's a guest coming to check in.
It's 10:32 PM and I don't even want to look up to see who's coming in. My eyes were sore from staring at the fluorescent computer screen, and the back of my knees were aching. Without looking up from my desk, I faked a smile and said, "Welcome...Can I have your last name please?"
"Templin", says the deep, friendly voice.
"Hmmm... Temp....Templin...... Ah, found you." I clicked on his last name and his profile came up.
"I see that you're staying with us for two nights, departing Friday morning, at a group rate of $129 per night. You're also with the border patrol, right?"
"Right", he said. This is when I finally looked up from my screen and braced myself for the view. Standing right there in front of me was strikingly handsome, Caucasian male.
His haircut was sharp as ever, and his ocean eyes created a duet with his colgate smile. He was sporting a navy blue polo with dark-blue jeans, and his body was muscularly toned. My heart almost dropped, but my pen made it's way to the floor.
I managed to slip out a feeble "Great!", and proceeded with checking him in.
"How many keys can I get for you Mr. Templin?"
"One will be fine."
I noticed myself acting like a girl. I swung my hair to the side and perked up when I stood. His good-looks were making my head boggle.
"Okay.. To get to your suite, you can take this elevator on your left-hand side up to the fourth floor. We're currently renovating our hotel, so our breakfast and managers reception will take place on the eighth floor."
He gave me a genuine smile and took the keys.
"Thanks a lot!" he replied and made his way towards the elevators.
"Wow", I thought to myself.
Fifteen minutes later, my work had been finished and I was cleaning up. I was in such a rush to get outta there that I didn't even notice him standing there.
"Do you have any suggestions of where a guy like me can go out tonight?"
And that's when the small talk started.
After I had given him a few suggestions and hints, he gave me a cheerful "thanks!" and stepped outside of the hotel. I noticed for the first time in a while that my hands were moist; his presence had startled me. I peeked out of my desk and noticed him pacing up and down the front entrance. His phone was glued to his ear and his facial expressions showed his restlessness.
I was finally done. I grabbed all of my lip glosses from my storage cabinet, ran into the restroom, and tried to fix myself up. My hair was messy and my bangs were pulled back. The pink ribbon I was wearing on my head was quickly pulled off and I rearranged a new style. I shook off and dug for the keys in my purse. As soon as I clocked out, I made my way for the front entrance of the hotel; my flats clicked every time I took a step.
He gave me a big smile when I walked out and I took this as my cue.
"Did ya find somewhere to go tonight?' I asked with a hopeful tone.
"No...All the BP guys are already inside their rooms and I'm the only loser out here who wants to have a little fun."
"So go jump in the pool! I closes at midnight."
"Jump in the pool?" he answers surprisingly. "Every time I go to a hotel, there is always that creepy guy swimming in the pool late at night. I don't wanna be that guy..."
"I'm sure nobody would have a problem with you swimming in there. Creepy is hardly the word to describe you."
"So what would you describe me as?"
Our conversation flowed for a good half hour. The street lights and the freeway noise complemented our words nicely. He told me all about him: he was from San Diego and was here to get some hands-on training for the BP. I was getting tedious standing up, so I asked him to walk with me around the parking lot. Our shoulders would brush from time to time and our laughter rang across the street.
"I don't think I locked my truck Eunice, lemme go check."
I followed him to his 4-Runner and he opened the drivers door.
"Unlock this one!" I said tiptoeing over the hood.
We ended up sitting next to each other in his truck and comparing our iPod music. He had a lot of Tupac, Chingy, 50 Cent, whereas I had Alan Jackson, George Strait, and Martina McBride. Everything felt so surreal at this point in time; we reached an awkward silence and leaned over to the passenger seat.
"Are you trying to kiss me?" I asked stupidly.
He had no response to my silly question.
"Because if you are, go for it. I'm totally down..."
And he did.
Wednesday, October 10, 2007
Thursday, September 13, 2007
"Oh Brother, Where Art Thou?"
I've loved you since the day we became brother and sister.
I can watch the home-video of your 3-yr-old self splashing in puddles in your speedos all day long. You had such a sweet smile at that age...
Remember how people would confuse us for twins? I would love to lie and say we were, while you flatly denied that you even knew me. Our voices would even sound the same over the phone.
Remember how we used to fight? We would have these horrifying arguments that would echo throughout the whole house. How did we let that happen?
Remember the day you kneeled on the floor and wept on your bed because you didn't achieve that goal you so early worked for? You broke my heart that night.
Can you recall all those afternoons I'd spend with you while you played Metal Gear Solid on your PS1? I'd literally sit next to you and stare at the screen- you'd never let me play...
You and I used to love to ride roller coasters. We'd get on them over and over until our stomachs churned. When we would fall asleep that night, we'd dream about riding them all over again.
Remember the night we went dancing in Juarez? When it was just you and me? We went to grab some tacos later and we couldn't stop laughing... and then we got pulled over...
Remember the day you left? Unexpected tears rolled down my cheeks and I saw that you wanted to cry too, but you didn't...
I walk around the house these days and gaze at your empty room. I swipe my finger on your furniture and I find dust. Nothing is there; like empty school classrooms on summer break.
I try my best to replace you, but I've found it to be impossible. Although I know you should be where you are now, I'd much rather have you here.
I definitely did not expect to miss you.
I can watch the home-video of your 3-yr-old self splashing in puddles in your speedos all day long. You had such a sweet smile at that age...
Remember how people would confuse us for twins? I would love to lie and say we were, while you flatly denied that you even knew me. Our voices would even sound the same over the phone.
Remember how we used to fight? We would have these horrifying arguments that would echo throughout the whole house. How did we let that happen?
Remember the day you kneeled on the floor and wept on your bed because you didn't achieve that goal you so early worked for? You broke my heart that night.
Can you recall all those afternoons I'd spend with you while you played Metal Gear Solid on your PS1? I'd literally sit next to you and stare at the screen- you'd never let me play...
You and I used to love to ride roller coasters. We'd get on them over and over until our stomachs churned. When we would fall asleep that night, we'd dream about riding them all over again.
Remember the night we went dancing in Juarez? When it was just you and me? We went to grab some tacos later and we couldn't stop laughing... and then we got pulled over...
Remember the day you left? Unexpected tears rolled down my cheeks and I saw that you wanted to cry too, but you didn't...
I walk around the house these days and gaze at your empty room. I swipe my finger on your furniture and I find dust. Nothing is there; like empty school classrooms on summer break.
I try my best to replace you, but I've found it to be impossible. Although I know you should be where you are now, I'd much rather have you here.
I definitely did not expect to miss you.
Saturday, September 08, 2007
Never-Changing Dilemma
Is change good?
As we walk through life, we become accustomed to the same scenic path and see the same things over and over. I must admit that it's nice to have that comforting routine we can always fall back on- but isn't is also nice to try something new?
What I hate about change is the painful transition between the new and the old. I have been known to hold on to things longer than needed and acknowledge that I may need help sometimes.
About a month ago, I found myself wailing over a much loved vehicle. Pat was a rugged 4x4 SUV that proved herself by riding strong for seven years. The whole family had made numerous memories with her that included off-roading, road trips and several unmentionables. My parents came home one day with a shiny, new '06 Pathfinder and tears were spilled as I realized that Pat had been traded in. Although this was a awesome, different change, my heart couldn't help feeling punctured and empty. This is what I mean by 'pain' with change.
With people, change is even harder. I have to really make an effort to control my feelings and stay as happy as possible.
When it comes to dealing with "out with the old, and in with the new", I wonder if I'll always have to deal with the pain.
As we walk through life, we become accustomed to the same scenic path and see the same things over and over. I must admit that it's nice to have that comforting routine we can always fall back on- but isn't is also nice to try something new?
What I hate about change is the painful transition between the new and the old. I have been known to hold on to things longer than needed and acknowledge that I may need help sometimes.
About a month ago, I found myself wailing over a much loved vehicle. Pat was a rugged 4x4 SUV that proved herself by riding strong for seven years. The whole family had made numerous memories with her that included off-roading, road trips and several unmentionables. My parents came home one day with a shiny, new '06 Pathfinder and tears were spilled as I realized that Pat had been traded in. Although this was a awesome, different change, my heart couldn't help feeling punctured and empty. This is what I mean by 'pain' with change.
With people, change is even harder. I have to really make an effort to control my feelings and stay as happy as possible.
When it comes to dealing with "out with the old, and in with the new", I wonder if I'll always have to deal with the pain.
Thursday, June 14, 2007
Is It a Bummer or a Killer?
The catalyst that saves it or breaks it is powerfull indeed. It not only presents itself, makes itself known and infers intentions, it also causes striking results.
To my catalyst(!) : Unexpected as you were- calling me at midnight and tempting me with your oh so sweet words- you caused me to light up. The melody of your voice had such an interesting cue, and your stereotypical choice of words intrigued me very much. I had known you for so long yet I felt like a total stranger to you. Slowly but surely, you found your way into my head and introduced a whole new way of looking at things. Your confessions were like a cold shower, shocking, unexpected and exhilirating. The truth is, I became addicted.
Allow me to skip everything that was in between and jump straight into our finale. You gave me gift, only to take it away. You and I both allowed ourselves to let go and permit our emotions to get a hold of us. It's okay though, everything looks like it's going to turn out fine. I assure you it will.
I congratulate you with courage for putting a stop to it.
In reward, I give you a simple thank you for putting that spark in my life that I so dearly yearned for.
Be cool.
To my catalyst(!) : Unexpected as you were- calling me at midnight and tempting me with your oh so sweet words- you caused me to light up. The melody of your voice had such an interesting cue, and your stereotypical choice of words intrigued me very much. I had known you for so long yet I felt like a total stranger to you. Slowly but surely, you found your way into my head and introduced a whole new way of looking at things. Your confessions were like a cold shower, shocking, unexpected and exhilirating. The truth is, I became addicted.
Allow me to skip everything that was in between and jump straight into our finale. You gave me gift, only to take it away. You and I both allowed ourselves to let go and permit our emotions to get a hold of us. It's okay though, everything looks like it's going to turn out fine. I assure you it will.
I congratulate you with courage for putting a stop to it.
In reward, I give you a simple thank you for putting that spark in my life that I so dearly yearned for.
Be cool.
Friday, May 11, 2007
Everything Comes To An End
School's out and the summer awaits! I got some things planned for these months and God willing, they all turn out to my benefit. I've learned so many awesome things this semester, and I hope to not ever forget them.
In Philosophy, I learned that eros can mean many things to many people. Whether it's a love for wisdom, a love for oneself or another, or even a love for love, eros translates into a beautiful word that is love itself. In Psychology, I learned many terms and conditions such as Brocas aphasia, acetocholine, and the fundamental attribution error. Psychology is not always about therapy, but about the reasons of why people act the way they do; whether it because they choose to, or cause they have a condition. Political Science stirred up my mind as we talked about current world issues and policies. I learned about different governmental institutions and why the world is the way it is today. History revived my mind of the past. Ulysses Grant, Robert E. Lee, Lincoln, Benito Juarez and many others brought back amazing stories that shaped my American culture. English engaged me in rhetoric arguments and our nations current events. This class sharpened up my writing skills and reminded me of a very important thing: I love to write.
I can honestly say I was blessed with five amazing teachers, I hope to have the same in store for next semester.
In Philosophy, I learned that eros can mean many things to many people. Whether it's a love for wisdom, a love for oneself or another, or even a love for love, eros translates into a beautiful word that is love itself. In Psychology, I learned many terms and conditions such as Brocas aphasia, acetocholine, and the fundamental attribution error. Psychology is not always about therapy, but about the reasons of why people act the way they do; whether it because they choose to, or cause they have a condition. Political Science stirred up my mind as we talked about current world issues and policies. I learned about different governmental institutions and why the world is the way it is today. History revived my mind of the past. Ulysses Grant, Robert E. Lee, Lincoln, Benito Juarez and many others brought back amazing stories that shaped my American culture. English engaged me in rhetoric arguments and our nations current events. This class sharpened up my writing skills and reminded me of a very important thing: I love to write.
I can honestly say I was blessed with five amazing teachers, I hope to have the same in store for next semester.
A Fun Memory
The night was young and my hair was looking pretty darn good. I had a black mini-skirt on with a matching black low-cut sweater that made me look innocent. And Innocent I was!
Downtown Los Angeles, driving in a chic BMW with the top down, heading to my first club. I was sixteen and my cousin was 25. I had gone down to L.A for a week as a birthday gift from my parents and stayed in my cousins cool apartment in Pasadena. We had decided that it was time for me to discover this clubbin' experience so we headed down to a hip new dance club that had just opened. We tried our hardest to make myself look like 18, and although our attempts were in vain, the club bouncer let me in only because my cousin sweet talked him into it. Nervous as I was, my face showed the complete opposite. I walked confidently and smiled to all those who were giving me stares. I had never been to a club before and getting used to an atmosphere like that was quite a task. The loud music sang while my cousin and I found a table. And then he caught my eye; 5'12, athletic-built, asian and oh so hot. I knew I wanted to dance with him as soon as I had layed my eyes on him. Coaxed my my cousin, I made my way past him and made sure he caught my eye...minutes later, we were hitting it off on the dance floor. My heart raced and my eyes glittered as I danced my heart away on that Hollywood floor. There was nowhere else I wanted to be, but right there dancing with him.
Downtown Los Angeles, driving in a chic BMW with the top down, heading to my first club. I was sixteen and my cousin was 25. I had gone down to L.A for a week as a birthday gift from my parents and stayed in my cousins cool apartment in Pasadena. We had decided that it was time for me to discover this clubbin' experience so we headed down to a hip new dance club that had just opened. We tried our hardest to make myself look like 18, and although our attempts were in vain, the club bouncer let me in only because my cousin sweet talked him into it. Nervous as I was, my face showed the complete opposite. I walked confidently and smiled to all those who were giving me stares. I had never been to a club before and getting used to an atmosphere like that was quite a task. The loud music sang while my cousin and I found a table. And then he caught my eye; 5'12, athletic-built, asian and oh so hot. I knew I wanted to dance with him as soon as I had layed my eyes on him. Coaxed my my cousin, I made my way past him and made sure he caught my eye...minutes later, we were hitting it off on the dance floor. My heart raced and my eyes glittered as I danced my heart away on that Hollywood floor. There was nowhere else I wanted to be, but right there dancing with him.
What I Do
Everything happens for a reason.
I just had a remarkable person visit me tonight and he gave me a strong reminder of the kind of person I am. He told me I changed his life, that I made a total breakthrough in him.
Sometimes, good things come out of bad ones and we need to learn to recognize them when they come about. I had a very regretful summer last year and I learned one too many things. My visitor also had a eventful summer that wrecked his life apart. When I conversed with this person tonight, memories flooded my brain and my heart. I had made decisions that hurt me and those around me just because I wanted to have 'a little fun'.
God speaks through people. His words and advice are carefully entwined with the words spoke by those who love us. I heard God speak to me this weekend through my mother and through a special friend. To all those who are reading this now, I advise you to listen more attentively to the words spoken by those who care for you. Your future could depend on a personal conversation or in a single sentence. When you are in trouble, God tends to notice and gives you a hand in need. I just thought I'd let God speak through me tonight.
I just had a remarkable person visit me tonight and he gave me a strong reminder of the kind of person I am. He told me I changed his life, that I made a total breakthrough in him.
Sometimes, good things come out of bad ones and we need to learn to recognize them when they come about. I had a very regretful summer last year and I learned one too many things. My visitor also had a eventful summer that wrecked his life apart. When I conversed with this person tonight, memories flooded my brain and my heart. I had made decisions that hurt me and those around me just because I wanted to have 'a little fun'.
God speaks through people. His words and advice are carefully entwined with the words spoke by those who love us. I heard God speak to me this weekend through my mother and through a special friend. To all those who are reading this now, I advise you to listen more attentively to the words spoken by those who care for you. Your future could depend on a personal conversation or in a single sentence. When you are in trouble, God tends to notice and gives you a hand in need. I just thought I'd let God speak through me tonight.
Me and My Man
Getting married is something that me and many other girls dream of. Other than your sweet sixteen, it's really the only day when all the attention is on you. I have many fantasies about this special day but the doubts consume me. What if I choose the wrong guy? What if I gain weight last minute and my dress doesn't fit? What if nobody comes? What if we run out of alcohol? What if he's sterile!!!
I know I'm exaggerating quite a bit, but you never know. The person I'm with at the moment is very different to who I expect to end up with. I imagine myself with a tall, athletic-built guy with bright blue eyes. I'd love for him to have Texas drawl and his hair would have to be dirty blonde. Although my man is nothing like that, I would love to get 'hitched' to him.
The thing that scares me is that I would have to spend the rest of my life with one man. It's hard for me to keep my eyes set on one guy for more than a month (although Adrian is the only exception), would I be able to last a lifetime? Turning the question around, would he be able to support me for the rest of our lives? I can only imagine. To me, divorce is not an option; if I choose a man to be with me till my last day, it's gotta be because really, truly love him
I know I'm exaggerating quite a bit, but you never know. The person I'm with at the moment is very different to who I expect to end up with. I imagine myself with a tall, athletic-built guy with bright blue eyes. I'd love for him to have Texas drawl and his hair would have to be dirty blonde. Although my man is nothing like that, I would love to get 'hitched' to him.
The thing that scares me is that I would have to spend the rest of my life with one man. It's hard for me to keep my eyes set on one guy for more than a month (although Adrian is the only exception), would I be able to last a lifetime? Turning the question around, would he be able to support me for the rest of our lives? I can only imagine. To me, divorce is not an option; if I choose a man to be with me till my last day, it's gotta be because really, truly love him
Smack That
I hope I don't go to prison for saying this, but when I have children of my own, you can bet that I'll give them a good whooping from time to time. I also talk from experience when I say this.
Starting from the age of two or so, I received a good spanking whenever I misbehaved. The hits progressively became harder and the tools that were used to give the hits transformed from a hand to a stem whip.
Allow me to recreate a scene: Let's say that I not only brought home a bad grade, but I also talked bad to my mom, had a intensive fight with my brother, and got caught in a lie with my dad...all in the same day. My father would then address the issue by taking me into his room, locking the door, and bringing along his sturdy stem whip. He'd sit me down on the bed and have a way-too-calm talk with me. I'd desperately try to explain that it was somehow not my fault, that I'd never do it again, and yadda-yadda-yada. My words would be broken with tears and my mind would frantically try to come up with excuses to give to my dad. Finally, my dad would tell me his penalty: two hits, three if I made a fuss. I'd wail even louder as I voluntarily pulled down my pants and exposed my six layers of underwear (you see, I was prepared). I'd turn my back to him, lay my front face down on the bed, grab a pillow to bite down on, and brace myself for the worst. My anticipation was cut short by a quick "SWIPPP!" and the pain surged right through my skin.
After my beating, my head ached and my legs burned. I expressed my pain with loud, weeping howls that echoed through the whole house. My sister would always stand behind the door and wait for my dad to finish only to cry with me; she'd stroke my hair and wipe my tears as my cries continued.
Only then was when I truly learned not to do it again.
Starting from the age of two or so, I received a good spanking whenever I misbehaved. The hits progressively became harder and the tools that were used to give the hits transformed from a hand to a stem whip.
Allow me to recreate a scene: Let's say that I not only brought home a bad grade, but I also talked bad to my mom, had a intensive fight with my brother, and got caught in a lie with my dad...all in the same day. My father would then address the issue by taking me into his room, locking the door, and bringing along his sturdy stem whip. He'd sit me down on the bed and have a way-too-calm talk with me. I'd desperately try to explain that it was somehow not my fault, that I'd never do it again, and yadda-yadda-yada. My words would be broken with tears and my mind would frantically try to come up with excuses to give to my dad. Finally, my dad would tell me his penalty: two hits, three if I made a fuss. I'd wail even louder as I voluntarily pulled down my pants and exposed my six layers of underwear (you see, I was prepared). I'd turn my back to him, lay my front face down on the bed, grab a pillow to bite down on, and brace myself for the worst. My anticipation was cut short by a quick "SWIPPP!" and the pain surged right through my skin.
After my beating, my head ached and my legs burned. I expressed my pain with loud, weeping howls that echoed through the whole house. My sister would always stand behind the door and wait for my dad to finish only to cry with me; she'd stroke my hair and wipe my tears as my cries continued.
Only then was when I truly learned not to do it again.
Thursday, May 10, 2007
Hello Goodbye
I started my new job yesterday. =)
Compared to Village Inn, this job was a piece of cake! I was introduced to the restaurant and I picked things up easily. I had more liberty in my work and there wasn't a manager always behind my back. I'm still trying to get used to a few things, these include me being my own cashier, getting more familiarized with the menu, the fact that there are only two waitresses, and getting to know all of our regular customers. I am IN LOVE with our uniforms! I get to wear my khaki shorts with a cute polo and sport it without restrictions.
This new job made me realize just how much I am going to miss Village Inn. I am so used to the hell they give me over there and I have just come to the realization that V.I has come to be a great and important part of my life. I know I can't stay there forever, and the time I've been there has been more than enough for any girl my age. Jobs come and go, just as people come and go. I feel a great need to close this chapter in my life and start a new one, even if it's painful to start over.
Compared to Village Inn, this job was a piece of cake! I was introduced to the restaurant and I picked things up easily. I had more liberty in my work and there wasn't a manager always behind my back. I'm still trying to get used to a few things, these include me being my own cashier, getting more familiarized with the menu, the fact that there are only two waitresses, and getting to know all of our regular customers. I am IN LOVE with our uniforms! I get to wear my khaki shorts with a cute polo and sport it without restrictions.
This new job made me realize just how much I am going to miss Village Inn. I am so used to the hell they give me over there and I have just come to the realization that V.I has come to be a great and important part of my life. I know I can't stay there forever, and the time I've been there has been more than enough for any girl my age. Jobs come and go, just as people come and go. I feel a great need to close this chapter in my life and start a new one, even if it's painful to start over.
I Haven't Learned
This whole 'studying' thing has taught me oh so much. I can also say that this semester has been filled with so many new things. I have come to the point when I need to make a decision, then I try to remember what I did in the past, but I cannot remember because there are so many other experiences blocking it! So I make the same mistake about twice.
Just yesterday night, I was trying to finish my 'cramming' for my Psychology final when an old friend called me and invited me to study with her. I find myself at Village Inn (not again!), comfortable in a booth, and immensely engaged in conversation with my buddy. Here and then we'd take a couple of notes down and exchange info, but talking about boys and high school seemed to be much more interesting for the both of us. As I was talking to her, I was consciously aware that I wasn't getting any work done and yet I continued to gossip.
This has happened to me about four times this year already. The funny thing is that I already predicted that I would not get any studying done and i still went along and met with her.
When I study, I need to be alone and I need to have breaks. I get my stuff done if I sit down and do it. Will I ever learn?
Just yesterday night, I was trying to finish my 'cramming' for my Psychology final when an old friend called me and invited me to study with her. I find myself at Village Inn (not again!), comfortable in a booth, and immensely engaged in conversation with my buddy. Here and then we'd take a couple of notes down and exchange info, but talking about boys and high school seemed to be much more interesting for the both of us. As I was talking to her, I was consciously aware that I wasn't getting any work done and yet I continued to gossip.
This has happened to me about four times this year already. The funny thing is that I already predicted that I would not get any studying done and i still went along and met with her.
When I study, I need to be alone and I need to have breaks. I get my stuff done if I sit down and do it. Will I ever learn?
Wednesday, May 02, 2007
Defying Stereotypes
I think it's about time I wrote about this one:
Alex is one stubborn, unconditionally loving, tempered and sweetest sister a girl could ever have. Her birthday is next week and this gal will be 23. There is one important (or may I say not important?) thing about my sister; She has Down's syndrome.
Every time I have to write about a journal topic of some sort, my mind likes to bring her up. I guess it would be accurate to say that she is one of my favorite topics.
I've always said that Alex is a brat in the middle of the day but an angel in the morning and at night. My sister helps me in everything; being a neat freak, she organizes and tidies up the room frequently. She gets feisty when she's all dressed up and ready to hit the town. Her long black her swings as she walks and her small hazel eyes show confidence. Sometimes she is too social and annoys me with questions she already knows the answers to.
But more than annoying, she is generous. Although she doesn't like to share her lotions, perfumes, lip glosses, or mints- she is otherwise very giving.
My sister is very pretty compared to most kids with Down's-( she's even prettier than most normal people), and that is something I am oh so proud of. She pulls off Abercrombie and Express just nicely and her light complexion is one to die for.
That's my sis.
Alex is one stubborn, unconditionally loving, tempered and sweetest sister a girl could ever have. Her birthday is next week and this gal will be 23. There is one important (or may I say not important?) thing about my sister; She has Down's syndrome.
Every time I have to write about a journal topic of some sort, my mind likes to bring her up. I guess it would be accurate to say that she is one of my favorite topics.
I've always said that Alex is a brat in the middle of the day but an angel in the morning and at night. My sister helps me in everything; being a neat freak, she organizes and tidies up the room frequently. She gets feisty when she's all dressed up and ready to hit the town. Her long black her swings as she walks and her small hazel eyes show confidence. Sometimes she is too social and annoys me with questions she already knows the answers to.
But more than annoying, she is generous. Although she doesn't like to share her lotions, perfumes, lip glosses, or mints- she is otherwise very giving.
My sister is very pretty compared to most kids with Down's-( she's even prettier than most normal people), and that is something I am oh so proud of. She pulls off Abercrombie and Express just nicely and her light complexion is one to die for.
That's my sis.
Monday, April 30, 2007
Me and Mexico
I've been crossing the border since I was 1 yr old. There are times when I really used to hate it; the lines to cross back home to the U.S were so long and tiresome. Going to Juarez with my family became a once or twice a week custom, and I found it quite enjoyable. Although the shift from this country to the other was a very noticeable one, I became accustomed to it.
Cheap food, cheap products, and cheap services is what draws me to Mexico these days. You can always get full with 3 dollars, or you can always find contact lenses 100 dollars cheaper than those here in El Paso. Now that I'm more than old enough to drink in Juarez, I do it moderately and in the company of others. Family parties and gatherings are just so much more relaxed and enjoyable than the ones we have here.
Just two weeks ago, it was my niece's 1 yr old birthday and allow me to say that it was one of the coolest birthday parties I've been to. It was just so chillin' and social that I could've stayed there the whole night.
My parents say that Juarez just isn't what it used to be. There were no such things as drive-by's or random shootings, or even raping. It was just a busy little city that was eagerly drying to develop. Regardless of it's past or present, that city just makes me happy. =)
Cheap food, cheap products, and cheap services is what draws me to Mexico these days. You can always get full with 3 dollars, or you can always find contact lenses 100 dollars cheaper than those here in El Paso. Now that I'm more than old enough to drink in Juarez, I do it moderately and in the company of others. Family parties and gatherings are just so much more relaxed and enjoyable than the ones we have here.
Just two weeks ago, it was my niece's 1 yr old birthday and allow me to say that it was one of the coolest birthday parties I've been to. It was just so chillin' and social that I could've stayed there the whole night.
My parents say that Juarez just isn't what it used to be. There were no such things as drive-by's or random shootings, or even raping. It was just a busy little city that was eagerly drying to develop. Regardless of it's past or present, that city just makes me happy. =)
Friday, April 27, 2007
"And We're Ready to Order.."
I've been a waitress for three years now, and allow me to say: three hard years.
I've been working in this breakfast restaurant ( and I will not give out the name in case they come looking for me) for a good two years. This precise restaurant, has given me the most headaches, heartaches, and backaches than any man has ever given me.
It took me a while to get truly integrated into this working environment. I've discovered and rediscovered that being a waitress is oh so hard. We at "the restaurant" have many tasks to balance at once. Just this past weekend, I had to train a new girl and she found the job a bit overwhelming. Once I'm done taking an order, I gotta plug it into the comp, give it to the cooks, refill the OJ, grab two waters and coffee, run it to table 63, tell them to wait a minute, ask 65 if they would like a to-go box and ask 62 if they're doin' alright, run right back to 63 ( or was it 64?) and take their order- which turns out they would like to wait for two more people, and I still have to manage a smile.
I know that there are much easier waitressing jobs out there, but for some reason I can't seem to leave Village Inn (oops. . . oh well). I'm so used to my managers, my fellow co-workers, and my regular customers. I come out of there feeling like I was a tossed-around trash bag. The back of my knees ache like there was no tomorrow and all I want to do is sleep. There are days when I'd rather take a 5 hr nap than go out clubbing with my friends.
My New Year's Resolution was to quit. It's almost May and I'm still there.
I've been working in this breakfast restaurant ( and I will not give out the name in case they come looking for me) for a good two years. This precise restaurant, has given me the most headaches, heartaches, and backaches than any man has ever given me.
It took me a while to get truly integrated into this working environment. I've discovered and rediscovered that being a waitress is oh so hard. We at "the restaurant" have many tasks to balance at once. Just this past weekend, I had to train a new girl and she found the job a bit overwhelming. Once I'm done taking an order, I gotta plug it into the comp, give it to the cooks, refill the OJ, grab two waters and coffee, run it to table 63, tell them to wait a minute, ask 65 if they would like a to-go box and ask 62 if they're doin' alright, run right back to 63 ( or was it 64?) and take their order- which turns out they would like to wait for two more people, and I still have to manage a smile.
I know that there are much easier waitressing jobs out there, but for some reason I can't seem to leave Village Inn (oops. . . oh well). I'm so used to my managers, my fellow co-workers, and my regular customers. I come out of there feeling like I was a tossed-around trash bag. The back of my knees ache like there was no tomorrow and all I want to do is sleep. There are days when I'd rather take a 5 hr nap than go out clubbing with my friends.
My New Year's Resolution was to quit. It's almost May and I'm still there.
Wednesday, April 25, 2007
Free Willy
Ah! The future looks bright!
I've been trying to find out what it is that I want to do with the rest of my life. So far, I've lowered it down to one choice. How 'bout a Marine Mammal Trainer?
Since age 7, I've imagined myself working at Sea World riding the whales. I think I got the whole dream thing goin' on: Imagine me, living in the suburbs of San Antonio. Beautiful little country house with a sunroof shining down a stainless-steel kitchen. Get up early to drive a few blocks to the water park and join my best friend Shamu for a morning swim. We'd practice our performance drill a couple of hours and I'd slip into my sleek swimsuit for showtime. We'd baffle our audience with our high jumps, smooth glides, and deep plunges. Applause would follow our act and I'd bow while Shamu would flap his fins.
This is my dream, believe it or not. This is how I see myself in the near future.
...can't wait!
I've been trying to find out what it is that I want to do with the rest of my life. So far, I've lowered it down to one choice. How 'bout a Marine Mammal Trainer?
Since age 7, I've imagined myself working at Sea World riding the whales. I think I got the whole dream thing goin' on: Imagine me, living in the suburbs of San Antonio. Beautiful little country house with a sunroof shining down a stainless-steel kitchen. Get up early to drive a few blocks to the water park and join my best friend Shamu for a morning swim. We'd practice our performance drill a couple of hours and I'd slip into my sleek swimsuit for showtime. We'd baffle our audience with our high jumps, smooth glides, and deep plunges. Applause would follow our act and I'd bow while Shamu would flap his fins.
This is my dream, believe it or not. This is how I see myself in the near future.
...can't wait!
Wednesday, April 18, 2007
A Philosophy About Death
At the light of recent events, many ideas and thoughts cross ones mind- especially mine. When these kinds of things happen- these bad things, I get depressed, upset, and worst of all: I philosophize a bit too much.
My parents always tell me to be careful when I go out. Whether it be at school, out to a party, lunch with my boyfriend, anything, they always give me their recommendations and blessings. There are many ways to protect a persons security. don't drive under the influence of drugs and/or alcohol, don't take drugs and alcohol, don't walk alone at night, stay away from strangers, don't take bad risks, etc... Many things can be done to avoid a sudden, accidental death. Right?
Yet, there are some things that cannot be done. As Christian as you may be, or as careful as you are: sometimes you just die. Imagine sitting in your French class, your professor is going on about French literature while your doodling on your notebook. All of a sudden, you hear loud shuffling noises outside your classroom, the door opens and someone with a gun shoots your professor in the head...then he shoots you.
Sometimes, and most of the times. we can prevent our death by taking various precautions. But there are times when there's nothing you can do. May God have all of the victims of the Virginia Tech massacre in his kingdom.
My parents always tell me to be careful when I go out. Whether it be at school, out to a party, lunch with my boyfriend, anything, they always give me their recommendations and blessings. There are many ways to protect a persons security. don't drive under the influence of drugs and/or alcohol, don't take drugs and alcohol, don't walk alone at night, stay away from strangers, don't take bad risks, etc... Many things can be done to avoid a sudden, accidental death. Right?
Yet, there are some things that cannot be done. As Christian as you may be, or as careful as you are: sometimes you just die. Imagine sitting in your French class, your professor is going on about French literature while your doodling on your notebook. All of a sudden, you hear loud shuffling noises outside your classroom, the door opens and someone with a gun shoots your professor in the head...then he shoots you.
Sometimes, and most of the times. we can prevent our death by taking various precautions. But there are times when there's nothing you can do. May God have all of the victims of the Virginia Tech massacre in his kingdom.
Monday, April 16, 2007
...And the Thunder Rolls...
I believe that if you analyze a concept, situation, or problem long enough you will reach a solution. Research, interpretation, and good ol' fashioned thinking will get you there. You will attain even more success if you seek the help and advice from others.
I have a problem. A big problem. It's name is Adrian. This problem has persisted for a year and a half and I'm not only starting to get drained from it, I'm getting ready to call it quits. When a person tells you that they care, they should demonstrate it. Our relationship was so much better when he was gone, at least he called. I'm tired of getting stood up, I'm tired of waiting for nothing, and I'm tired of wasting time. I already tried leaving; it was a plan that crashed and burned. The worst part is that I think that it's way too late to leave. I am already deeply immersed, addicted and obsessed with him that leaving would only make me feel worse. His smile is always present in my mind. Who am I gonna come home to? Who's gonna always find a way to make me giggle? When something great or bad happens to me, I find myself yearning to tell him. Adrian's my secret keeper. There are too many things on this earth that remind me of him too much; the military happens to be one of the big ones.
No matter how much I cry, or how dramatic I sound, he never changes. I've attacked my problem in many ways- all in which have let me down...way down. There's a fight every other day... My brother tells me, "How can you guys fight? There is nothing you two can fight about...you're too perfect together."
The worst part of the situation is that we indeed are perfect for each other. Adrian gets me. He just does. . . Now how am I supposed to get rid of someone who gets me?
I have a problem. A big problem. It's name is Adrian. This problem has persisted for a year and a half and I'm not only starting to get drained from it, I'm getting ready to call it quits. When a person tells you that they care, they should demonstrate it. Our relationship was so much better when he was gone, at least he called. I'm tired of getting stood up, I'm tired of waiting for nothing, and I'm tired of wasting time. I already tried leaving; it was a plan that crashed and burned. The worst part is that I think that it's way too late to leave. I am already deeply immersed, addicted and obsessed with him that leaving would only make me feel worse. His smile is always present in my mind. Who am I gonna come home to? Who's gonna always find a way to make me giggle? When something great or bad happens to me, I find myself yearning to tell him. Adrian's my secret keeper. There are too many things on this earth that remind me of him too much; the military happens to be one of the big ones.
No matter how much I cry, or how dramatic I sound, he never changes. I've attacked my problem in many ways- all in which have let me down...way down. There's a fight every other day... My brother tells me, "How can you guys fight? There is nothing you two can fight about...you're too perfect together."
The worst part of the situation is that we indeed are perfect for each other. Adrian gets me. He just does. . . Now how am I supposed to get rid of someone who gets me?
Baybeh
These days, I've been hanging out with a lot of one year olds... Especially one. I babysit this oh so sweet little girl with soft curls and a vibrant smile. I've come to notice many things about children this age, and about the people around them. My little girl is intensely interested in the Baby Einstein videos, it's funny to watch her laugh at them. She loves grapes and cheese, staying up late, and petting her Labrador. She throws a fit when I put her to sleep, but she finally gives up after a while and snoozes off. This child brings light into my opaque world.
I was at my nieces 1 yr old birthday party this weekend, and I got to hold her for the first time. Her bright green eyes and rosy cheeks captivated all those who saw her. I look around me and EVERYBODY wants to hold her; people stretch their arms out to her in hopes that she too wants to be held. I noticed that those who held her didn't want to give her to someone else either; people don't like to share babies. Why is it that we are so entertained by these kids? I know why I am: babies give unconditional love- this is something I desperately yearn for.
I was at my nieces 1 yr old birthday party this weekend, and I got to hold her for the first time. Her bright green eyes and rosy cheeks captivated all those who saw her. I look around me and EVERYBODY wants to hold her; people stretch their arms out to her in hopes that she too wants to be held. I noticed that those who held her didn't want to give her to someone else either; people don't like to share babies. Why is it that we are so entertained by these kids? I know why I am: babies give unconditional love- this is something I desperately yearn for.
Friday, March 02, 2007
College
It is not a very extravagant shift from high school into college; I'd like to describe more as...weird. I will admit that I like it, but I won't lie to you and say that I love it. I think it's honest to say that I hate all the free time I have, the organization in my life has completely vanished. Things get done at random times in random places, and some things don't even get done at all. I love how people are sitting and laying down all over campus, everybody is laid back. I hate that EVERYTHING is done online. WebCT is the most annoying thing on this earth- what happened to notebooks, pencils and paper? I love that nobody judges anybody, there are no popular cliches that everybody looks up to. I hate that I have to walk three miles to get to my classroom, and walk another three miles back to my truck. I think it's sad that most of the people that walk around campus walk alone. Our friends have classes at different places and different times and it is hard to somethimes concide with them
I'm comfortable here, but not satisfied. The one thing that I hate the most is that the excitement is gone. I hate waking up in the morning because I know that i have another tedious day ahead of me. All i know is that i have to get up in order to get ahead.
I'm comfortable here, but not satisfied. The one thing that I hate the most is that the excitement is gone. I hate waking up in the morning because I know that i have another tedious day ahead of me. All i know is that i have to get up in order to get ahead.
Friday, February 23, 2007
It's a Sip of Wine, It's Summertime...
I dream of it, I think of it, and I long for it... Summer. When that sun gives me a little hint of heat on my face, I smile.
I can honestly say that Summer makes me oh so happy. It's one thing that I love about this city- the heat and the heat. I wait all year for it, wearing jackets and sweaters only makes me bitter. I hate not wanting to go outside because it's too cold to sit on the curb. Winter is harsh... days are short and the night is long.
When it's Summer, I can roll down the windows of my truck and let the wind blow against my face. I can drive barefoot and turn up Dwight Yoakam way, way loud. I can already see myself; sporting way too big sunglasses and too short shorts. I miss cold showers and sheetless nights. I miss sitting down on my driveway eating watermelon and spitting out the seeds on the the asphalt road. I miss feeling the sand between my toes, and the green turf under my heels. I miss swimming and playing catch on the street.
I miss it so...
I can honestly say that Summer makes me oh so happy. It's one thing that I love about this city- the heat and the heat. I wait all year for it, wearing jackets and sweaters only makes me bitter. I hate not wanting to go outside because it's too cold to sit on the curb. Winter is harsh... days are short and the night is long.
When it's Summer, I can roll down the windows of my truck and let the wind blow against my face. I can drive barefoot and turn up Dwight Yoakam way, way loud. I can already see myself; sporting way too big sunglasses and too short shorts. I miss cold showers and sheetless nights. I miss sitting down on my driveway eating watermelon and spitting out the seeds on the the asphalt road. I miss feeling the sand between my toes, and the green turf under my heels. I miss swimming and playing catch on the street.
I miss it so...
Friday, February 16, 2007
Pumpkin Pie
I have a Pitbull. She is an unmentionable, horrible, dumb- yet quite adorable dog... and her name is Pie. I've had Pie for about a year and a month, since Adrian gave her to me on my 18th birthday. I was never successfull in training her; she has ADD and never catches on to things. I also have a heinous rash on my wrists that was caused by her. This rash has lasted me about 9 months and I still haven't found a way to cure it.
The backyard is a pigstye. It is utterly disgusting. Pie made sure to destroy it to the very end. Our sprinkler system in disfunctioning, our telephone cord has been bitten off twice, and she even chewed her own house down to the dirt.
Now, Pie is beautifull. Her deep yellow-brown eyes light up when people are near, and her fur coat is uniquely imprinted with black and white spots.
Pie is leaving today. My mother is more than tired of her, and my rash is tearing me up.
Will I cry?
The backyard is a pigstye. It is utterly disgusting. Pie made sure to destroy it to the very end. Our sprinkler system in disfunctioning, our telephone cord has been bitten off twice, and she even chewed her own house down to the dirt.
Now, Pie is beautifull. Her deep yellow-brown eyes light up when people are near, and her fur coat is uniquely imprinted with black and white spots.
Pie is leaving today. My mother is more than tired of her, and my rash is tearing me up.
Will I cry?
Wednesday, February 07, 2007
The Gift of Sight
I read H.G Wells's"The Country of the Blind" this morning, I realized how much we take our eyesight for granted. Imagine if:
-All of our society was blind.
-We would live our lives based solely on our other four senses; touch, taste, smell, and hearing.
In this story, the main character comes across the Country of the Blind and encounters people who have genetically adapted themselves to their enviroment without the gift of sight. Nunez, the main character, talks about his experiences and the difficulties he had trying to adapt himself to society that couldn't see. he was considered a clumsy idiot, and it came down to the point where the people of the country wanted to surgically remove his eyes.
I don't think I could live without seeing so many things. The blueness of the sky, the vastness of our desert, the lively color of my sisters eyes, the Guadalupe Mountains, enjoying motion-picture films, the way El Paso looks at night, my mothers smile...
We humans seek for beauty. Beauty is our Eros. We desire to touch, taste, smell, and hear those things that are appealing to us by sight. Beauty is also a very important part of our lives. We strive to create beauty, to obtain it, to own and preserve it. I know that without sight, my life would be incomplete.
-All of our society was blind.
-We would live our lives based solely on our other four senses; touch, taste, smell, and hearing.
In this story, the main character comes across the Country of the Blind and encounters people who have genetically adapted themselves to their enviroment without the gift of sight. Nunez, the main character, talks about his experiences and the difficulties he had trying to adapt himself to society that couldn't see. he was considered a clumsy idiot, and it came down to the point where the people of the country wanted to surgically remove his eyes.
I don't think I could live without seeing so many things. The blueness of the sky, the vastness of our desert, the lively color of my sisters eyes, the Guadalupe Mountains, enjoying motion-picture films, the way El Paso looks at night, my mothers smile...
We humans seek for beauty. Beauty is our Eros. We desire to touch, taste, smell, and hear those things that are appealing to us by sight. Beauty is also a very important part of our lives. We strive to create beauty, to obtain it, to own and preserve it. I know that without sight, my life would be incomplete.
Wednesday, January 31, 2007
19 Going On 15
My parents have always been very strict with me. Curfews are early, partying is limited, and even hanging out at the house with my friends is under their control. I am 19 years old and am still very restricted to many privileges.
My parents are my everything, and disobeying them breaks my heart. Since i was in middle school, I have been imposed strict rules and was expected to follow them every day. Nowadays, following these rules has become not only a hassle, but a barrier that restrains me do do many things I want to do.
I watched my friends grow up too fast. While all my girlfriends wore heels and owned cell phones, I wore Keds and asked for permission to use my house phone. My parents made sure that my childhood lasted as long as it could and I now thank them for that. Although these rules have become daily headaches and my friends constantly complain about them, i make an effort to follow them.
My parents are my everything, and disobeying them breaks my heart. Since i was in middle school, I have been imposed strict rules and was expected to follow them every day. Nowadays, following these rules has become not only a hassle, but a barrier that restrains me do do many things I want to do.
I watched my friends grow up too fast. While all my girlfriends wore heels and owned cell phones, I wore Keds and asked for permission to use my house phone. My parents made sure that my childhood lasted as long as it could and I now thank them for that. Although these rules have become daily headaches and my friends constantly complain about them, i make an effort to follow them.
Friday, January 26, 2007
The Things I Worry About
Oh man, where do I start?
I have the very bad habit of worrying about the things that I have no control over; the things that will happen regardless of what I do to prevent them from happening. One very good example is that one of Adrian being sent to Iraq; you see, I KNOW it's going to happen, and i still worry over it.
I worry about my sister. She has Down's syndrome and I am one of the keepers of her destiny. It is up to my family and i to get her going on a successful path.
I worry about school, about the things I have to pay for... I am very concerned about my health since I have this disgusting rash on my arms, and most importantly.... I worry about my own future.
Too many worries in my opinion...
(eunice)
I have the very bad habit of worrying about the things that I have no control over; the things that will happen regardless of what I do to prevent them from happening. One very good example is that one of Adrian being sent to Iraq; you see, I KNOW it's going to happen, and i still worry over it.
I worry about my sister. She has Down's syndrome and I am one of the keepers of her destiny. It is up to my family and i to get her going on a successful path.
I worry about school, about the things I have to pay for... I am very concerned about my health since I have this disgusting rash on my arms, and most importantly.... I worry about my own future.
Too many worries in my opinion...
(eunice)
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)
